thedeadone.net » Cute http://thedeadone.net Wed, 08 Feb 2012 13:04:31 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.1.3 My daughter wants to be a Ninja! http://thedeadone.net/blog/my-daughter-wants-to-be-a-ninja/ http://thedeadone.net/blog/my-daughter-wants-to-be-a-ninja/#comments Mon, 09 Jan 2012 23:12:10 +0000 Mark Cunningham http://thedeadone.net/?p=1195

(I tried to avoid doing cross-post, but I think this is too cute to not share and it gives me an excuse to put Ninja legitimately in a post title!)

My seven year old daughter Alice announced she wants to be a ninja when she grows up. She’s already formed a secret ninja club (girls only) in her class. And after homework I was press ganged into making ninja stars from tin-foil and cardboard and my wife made braces from black velvet so she could start her ninja training. She plans to train every day.

Of course she is young, she has much to learn and she had many questions, like, how do ninjas train? What do they actually do? What weapons do ninjas use besides ninja stars (toilet roll nun-chucks are planned)? Hmm she is wise. :)

(Someone has already kindly pointed to the Ninja-shirt-technique. This will be tomorrow’s Ninja training!)

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]]> http://thedeadone.net/blog/my-daughter-wants-to-be-a-ninja/feed/ 1 More Alice quotes http://thedeadone.net/blog/more-alice-quotes/ http://thedeadone.net/blog/more-alice-quotes/#comments Mon, 25 Feb 2008 14:23:16 +0000 Mark Cunningham http://thedeadone.net/blog/more-alice-quotes/

Some more gems from my three year old daughter:

“You wouldn’t eat me Daddy. My head is too big to fit in your mouth.”

To her Maman:

“You’re my Best Mummy”

(Does she have more than one mummy?)

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]]> http://thedeadone.net/blog/more-alice-quotes/feed/ 0 More Wisdom from a Toddler http://thedeadone.net/blog/more-wisdom-from-a-toddler/ http://thedeadone.net/blog/more-wisdom-from-a-toddler/#comments Wed, 06 Feb 2008 05:30:18 +0000 Mark Cunningham http://thedeadone.net/blog/more-wisdom-from-a-toddler/

Alice (our 3-year old daughter) offers us her great wisdom:

Don’t say “Bloody Hell”, say “Oh My God”.

(last time)

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]]> http://thedeadone.net/blog/more-wisdom-from-a-toddler/feed/ 0 The Dinosaur Teaparty http://thedeadone.net/blog/the-dinosaur-teaparty/ http://thedeadone.net/blog/the-dinosaur-teaparty/#comments Tue, 05 Feb 2008 05:30:23 +0000 Mark Cunningham http://thedeadone.net/blog/the-dinosaur-teaparty/

Alice (our three year old daughter) has recently developed a love of dinosaurs and this is the result:

dsc01069.jpg

(Sorry about the low quality, I snapped this with my mobile phone camera)

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]]> http://thedeadone.net/blog/the-dinosaur-teaparty/feed/ 2 Capturing stars with an umbrella http://thedeadone.net/blog/capturing-stars-with-an-umbrella/ http://thedeadone.net/blog/capturing-stars-with-an-umbrella/#comments Tue, 15 Jan 2008 13:31:43 +0000 Mark Cunningham http://thedeadone.net/blog/capturing-stars-with-an-umbrella/

Yesterday I had to pick up Alice, my 3 year old daughter, from her after-school instead of my wife. Normally I drop the kids off and my wife does the pick-up, but she’s still out sick today.

I brought Alice’s little umbrella along. It’s a small pink frilly thing with picture’s of Disney’s trademark Cinderella on it and even though it’s not raining, she loves having it on the short walk out of the school. On this evening though, there was a wonderful evening sky. It was dark but clear, that wonderful black-blue smooth gradiant. The stars hadn’t come out yet but there was a small brilliant white crescent moon.

As we walked across the school yard, I pointed the moon out to her and said “you can nearly reach out and grab it”.

“Pick me up daddy, I want to catch the moon with my umbrella!” So I lift her up and she reaches out to this lovely sky with her pink umbrella until she declares that she’s got it. I put her down and she spins around and says “… and I let it go!”.

Then two more shakes of her umbrella and she tells me in the most serious tone, “I’m capturing the stars now!”.

“But Alice, there are no stars in the sky yet.”

“Daddy. I’m just pretending.”

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]]> http://thedeadone.net/blog/capturing-stars-with-an-umbrella/feed/ 1 Wisdom from a toddler http://thedeadone.net/blog/wisdom-from-a-toddler/ http://thedeadone.net/blog/wisdom-from-a-toddler/#comments Sun, 09 Sep 2007 22:44:21 +0000 Mark Cunningham http://thedeadone.net/blog/wisdom-from-a-toddler/

“Don’t say sugar, Daddy. Say shit.”

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]]> http://thedeadone.net/blog/wisdom-from-a-toddler/feed/ 1 Learning to GM from a toddler http://thedeadone.net/blog/learning-to-gm-from-a-toddler/ http://thedeadone.net/blog/learning-to-gm-from-a-toddler/#comments Tue, 19 Jun 2007 08:49:52 +0000 Mark Cunningham http://thedeadone.net/blog/learning-to-gm-from-a-toddler/

“Daddy, you sit there and I’ll read you a story”.
“Okay”.
Alice (our nearly-three year-old toddler) picks up her Maman’s romance novel and randomly opens it. “Once-apon-a-time-one-day, a group of yellow ducks go down to the swimming pool.” Alice goes to the next page. “They scream ‘AAAAAAAAAAA’.”
“Why do they scream?”
Alice shows me her most serious angry face look, squinting her eyes and squeezing her mouth tight and says… “Be quiet!”

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]]> http://thedeadone.net/blog/learning-to-gm-from-a-toddler/feed/ 2 “Listen here, Mr. Goat, did you poo on my head?” http://thedeadone.net/blog/listen-here-mr-goat-did-you-poo-on-my-head/ http://thedeadone.net/blog/listen-here-mr-goat-did-you-poo-on-my-head/#comments Tue, 01 May 2007 10:05:48 +0000 Mark Cunningham http://thedeadone.net/blog/listen-here-mr-goat-did-you-poo-on-my-head/

Cover of poo book My mother-in-law works for a publisher in France, kid’s books mostly. She gets piles of free books for kids. During Christmas, Alice my daughter, was playing with the pile of books and came across a book entitled “De la petite taupe qui voulait savoir qui lui avait fait sur la tete”. She loved it.

The book is about a mole who happens to have someone poo on his head! He then goes asks each animal did they poo on his head and compares their poo with the poo on his head. When he finds out who did it, he has his little revenge.

Here’s a scan of when he questions a goat:

insert of poo book

Brilliant. I think it’s originally German. I have found an English translation on Amazon.co.uk called “The Story of the Little Mole Who Knew It Was None of His Business”. I love these subversive children’s books. Alice gets a great kick out of it saying “Hey Goat!! Did you poo on my head?!?” “No, it wasn’t me!“. And then she pretends to take the poo of the page and plonk it on my head!

Little Update #1: I just noticed on the Amazon page for the book that it links to “The Gas We Pass: the Story of Farts”. Excellent!

Little Update #2: megglesmcgoo points out that:

Alice mentions that book in The vicar of Dibley

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]]> http://thedeadone.net/blog/listen-here-mr-goat-did-you-poo-on-my-head/feed/ 0 More astounding facts according to Alice! http://thedeadone.net/blog/more-astounding-facts-according-to-alice/ http://thedeadone.net/blog/more-astounding-facts-according-to-alice/#comments Tue, 20 Mar 2007 17:35:27 +0000 Mark Cunningham http://thedeadone.net/blog/more-astounding-facts-according-to-alice/

Previously on thedeadone.net, I shared some of the amazing “facts” that Alice, our nearly three years old daughter, had discovered. I’ve got two four new ones for you.

  • The kangaroos in her and Daddy’s bellies have gone.
  • Dinosaurs are actually Dragons. Most monsters are, actually.
  • All the air-planes in Dublin Airport are actually Robots. I don’t know if this is a good thing or a bad thing.
  • Oh and I nearly forgot, Swiper (from Dora the Explorer) is related to Firefox (the Internet Browser).

I’ll keep you updated on these astounding facts as Alice reveals them to us. :)

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]]> http://thedeadone.net/blog/more-astounding-facts-according-to-alice/feed/ 2 The world according to Alice… http://thedeadone.net/blog/the-world-according-to-alice/ http://thedeadone.net/blog/the-world-according-to-alice/#comments Wed, 21 Feb 2007 09:44:14 +0000 Mark Cunningham http://thedeadone.net/blog/the-world-according-to-our-alice/

Alice, our daughter, is now 2 (nearly 3) years old. I’m astounded every day by her simple logic, stringing conditions along with “and” and “or”. And she’s becoming more and more aware of the world around her, amazing us by her ever increasing comprehension. Sometimes she feels she needs to explain it to us. But then her imagination kicks in… so theses are some facts about the world, according to our toddler, that may amaze you.

  1. She’s knows that Maman has a baby in her belly.  But, what you didn’t know, is that Maman’s belly has a kitchen, a living room, a bedroom and a playroom for the baby.
  2. Daddy (me) and herself have kangaroos in our bellies.
  3. Dragons live in the Jungle. A good place to have them.
  4. A hippopotamus lives behind our shed and the oil tank is actually the spider’s house and so we should stay away from it.
  5. Swiper, a fox from the cartoon Dora the explorer, is bloom’in everywhere. He can be right in front of you, even though you can’t see him but can be frightened away, thankfully, by being firm and repeating the mantra “Swiper. No Swiping. Swiper. No Swiping” (taken from the cartoon FYI).
  6. Animals and people can be put into one of three groups: Maman, Daddy and “Alice” (sometimes called baby). There are some additional special categories, specifically for older animals and people: Granny or Mounet and Papu. It’s amazing how verstile this labelling this system. It can be applied to any picture.
  7. Barney has a big nose, apparently.
  8. All elephants are called Dumbo.
  9. Daddy is actually a gorilla.

I’m sure more amazing facts will be revealed in the coming months, I’ll keep you updated. :)

(Previously amazing facts from our daughter on thedeadone.net: “beep-beep” is nearly as versatile as fuck).

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